Who knew that Zach Randolph was such a great teammate? Well, of course Portland knew and if you had polled a vast majority of the NBA’s executives, they weren’t oblivious to The Big Zach Attack (not to be confused with Saved By The Bell’s Zach Morris).

Ah. But then what would life be like in this league without Lord Isiah to bring in Mr. Happy Meal to destroy even more credibility to a once prominent basketball franchise at 33rd and 7th. The latest form of team unity by the ex-jailed Blazer (no pun intended) was to toss water on Nate Robinson while on the bench late in the fourth quarter of what amounted to a stirring comeback win (113-100) over the Wizards in the nation’s capital last night.

Congress just ordered an full federal investigation of how Washington could get outscored 8-1 at the end of regulation and give up the first 11 in overtime translating to an absurd 19-1 Knicks’ run which gave them their 16th win against 37 defeats with 29 games left.

Afterwards, a jovial Isiah boasted about how his team improved to 1-0 post All-Star Break. He needed to pitch this as much as possible to change Dumb and Dumber Clown Mgt 101 ring-leader Jim Dolan’s mind about being unable to take on more contracts like a four-course meal at the NBA trade deadline.

“Brings out the dog out you,” Christmas team ornament Quentin Richardson said after contributing 19 points and six rebounds regarding the spat between Randolph and Robinson. “Play harder. I guess that’s what he’s saying. I guess we’ve got to do whatever it takes to keep pushing your teammates.”

“We haven’t been winning. We’ve been playing well. … It wasn’t frustration. It was just heat of the moment. We’re just playing. We don’t like to lose. It’s going to be the heat of the battle amongst each other, but we got to keep playing, kind of push it over the edge to make us play harder and harder.”

Randolph obviously wasn’t satisfied with his touches finishing 9-of-18 from the field for a team best 24 to go with 10 rebounds recording a double double which he confused with a double Whopper. Can you blame him? The man’s hungry. He’s got to eat.

Robinson, who admittedly struggled until draining a big trey late which started the run had 19 points, eight boards and five assists in a starting role, responded by tossing a towel in Happy Zach’s direction. Nothing like a little team unity.

“It’s just unacceptable, our approach to the game,” disgusted Washington coach Eddie Jordan said. “We just didn’t play hard enough. We didn’t play with a lot of purpose, and maybe we thought they were just going to give us the game, and it was just the opposite. … There was just no enthusiasm.”

Maybe his team which dropped to a dismal 1-7 this month picked up their opponents’ bad habits. Either that or they just can’t wait for leading scorer Gilbert Arenas to return so he can jack up nearly all the shots.

When he found out his team took the regular season series 2-1, Isiah immediately pointed toward the Randolph addition for this team-wide accomplishment. Too bad they’re 14-36 against everyone else.

Maybe they should secede from the NBA with Washington. The Wizards could change their team name to the Generals. Oh wait. That’s who the Harlem Globetrotters bitch slap.

Maybe they should just relocate to Siberia. They could then have a valid excuse to their remaining loyal fans including a frozen Spike Lee for why they rarely win. They were too cold. Paging the Polar Bears!

Knick basketball. Ya gotta love it.